Here are some techniques you can use to help you say things persuasively:
Get your idea straight.
Organise your thoughts. The most common source of confusing messages is unclear thinking. We have an idea we haven’t thought through. Or you have so much you want to say that you can’t possibly say it. Or you have an opinion that is so strong you can’t keep it in. As a result, you are ill prepared when you speak, and you confuse everyone. The first rule of plain talk, then, is to think before you say anything.
Say what you mean.
Say exactly what you mean
Get to the point as soon as possible.
Obviously it is good to frame an idea, but don’t beat around the bush. If you want someone to buy something, ask for the order. If you want someone to do something, say exactly what you want done.
Perhaps there are too many words in the world – but never enough to waste. Confusion grows in direct proportion to the number of words used. Speak plainly and briefly, using the shortest, most familiar words.
Each of us has a personality — a blending of traits, thought patterns and mannerisms — which can aid us in communicating clearly. For maximum clarity, be natural, and let the real you come through. You’ll be more convincing and much more comfortable.
Speak in images.
Words that help people visualise concepts are tremendous aids in communicating a message.
Learn that communication is also about listening, looking and learning
Sending messages is only part of the process of communicating. Receiving is the other half. So at the appropriate time, you have to stop sending and prepare to receive. To be a truly accomplished communicator, you must also cultivate the art of learning – by looking and listening. The communication that counts takes place when you take the time to stop, look and listen.
When you’re talking, you are not learning. – Listening Pays
Listening, like speaking and writing, requires thought and care. If you don’t concentrate on listening, you won’t learn much, and you won’t remember much of what you learn.
Listen With Your Eyes
If you listen only with your ears, you’re missing out on much of the message. Good listeners keep their eyes open while listening.
Look for feelings.
The face is an eloquent communication medium. Learn to read its messages. While the speaker is delivering a verbal message, the face can be saying, “I’m serious,” “Just kidding,” “It pains me to be telling you this,” or “This gives me great pleasure.”
Some non-verbal signals to watch for:
Rubbing one eye. When you hear “I guess you’re right,” and the speaker is rubbing one eye, guess again. Rubbing one eye often is a signal that the speaker is having trouble inwardly accepting something.
Tapping feet. When a statement is accompanied by foot-tapping, it usually indicates a lack of confidence in what is being said. Rubbing fingers. When you see the thumb and forefinger rubbing together, it often means that the speaker is holding something back.
Staring and blinking. If you’ve made your best offer and the other person stares at the ceiling and blinks rapidly, your offer is under consideration.
Crooked smiles. Most genuine smiles are symmetrical. And most facial expressions are fleeting. If a smile is noticeably crooked, you’re probably looking at a fake smile.
Eyes that avoid contact. Poor eye contact can be a sign of low self-esteem, but it can also indicate that the speaker is not being truthful. Or they just may be shy. Or they may be “imaging and thinking”
It would be unwise to make a decision based solely on these visible signals. But they can give you valuable tips on the kind of questions to ask and the kind of answers to be alert for.
Good Listeners Make Things Easy
People who are poor listeners will find few who are willing to come to them with useful information. Good listeners make it easy on those to whom they want to listen. They make it clear that they’re interested in what the other person has to say.